The Green Book Cliche Factory

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The Green Book won Best Picture at the Oscars so i decided to put it to the top of my watch list. To be honest I can see why Spike Lee got angry. It has a lot if clunky scenes which I have written below as i watched it. In fairness the performances were brilliant but from the guy who brought you Hair Sperm Cinema…. I think it should have been the last film to win considering what the competition was. Everyone has an opinion and this is mine.

Clunky scene 1: Two black workers are in Tony’s house and they are given a drink by the wife. Later on Tony takes the glasses and puts them in the bin. WE KNOW TONY IS A BIGOT. HE WON’T SHARE GLASSES WITH BLACK PEOPLE!

Clunky scene 2: In one of the many driving scenes, Tony stops to take a piss. He grabs his wallet to show that HE THINKS ALL BLACK PEOPLE ARE THIEVES.

Clunky weird scene 3: After the first concert, Tony is playing dice with all the other black drivers. TONY RELATES TO OTHER WORKING CLASS PEOPLE. HE ISN’T RACIST, JUST CLASSIST.

Clunky scene 4: Tony tries to steal a rock from a shop but Dr Shirley tells him to pay for it. TONY IS ON THE ROAD TO REDEMPTION. Also the rock makes an appearance later on.

Clunky scene 5: TONY IS BECOMING CULTURED. HIS FACE LIGHTS UP WITH THIS CLASSICAL MUSIC

clunky scene 6: THEY BOND OVER FRIED CHICKEN/// FFS!!! FRIED CHICKEN!!!!!

Clunky scene 7: Dr Shirley sees black people on the farm… BLACK PEOPLE ON THE FARM. Worst of the worst cliches. At least the farmers weren’t singing Zip-A-Dee-Doo-Dah

Clunky scene 8: Dr Shirley does his intellectual Shostakovich reference analogy to prove he is smarter. OSCAR PLAY.

Clunky scene 9: Refused a suit fitting in a shop Dr. Shirley plays the piano aggressively in the next scene.

Clunky scene 10: TONY IS BLACKER THAN DR SHIRLEY! and the PLOT TWIST IS PLAYED EVEN FURTHER TO WIN THE OSCAR.

Clunky scene 11: The Russians (Germans) SCHOOL TONY ON DR. SHIRLEY’S MOTIVES TO PLAY IN THE SOUTH.

Clunky scene 12: The BOSTONS story to not being allowed to eat in the restaurant while being black.

Clunky scene 13: They go to a dive bar and BE WORKING CLASS.

Clunky scene 14: Tony and Dr. Shirley bond over bar fried chicken. FRIED CHICKEN IS WHAT BRINGS AN ITALIAN AND BLACK MAN TOGETHER.

Clunky scene 15: The Dr. brings class to a dive bar by playing cool music. BLACK PEOPLE LOVE IT!

Clunky scene 16: THE CHEF COMES OUT OF THE KITCHEN TO LISTEN TO THIS COOL MUSIC. FRIED CHICKEN COOKING IS ON HOLD!

Clunky scene 17: The Dr is down on the cool music and plays like it’s def.

Clunky scene 18: NON RACIST POLICEMAN! THERE ARE GOOD GUYS THAT HAVE THE BADGE!

Clunky scene 19: OSCAR WIN FOR THE DR AND TONY SNOW DRIVE IN! SUCH POWER!

Clunky Scene 20: The Dr is in his apartment and looks at the throne… WTF

Clunky Scene 21: TONY HAS CHANAGED!!!!! CINEMA IS COMPLETE! RACISM HAS ENDED.

LAST Scene is so schhmaltzy and I may be cynical but i didn’t buy it. Roma deserved the award.

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