Tag: rupert murdoch

Vice Magazine Book Review

I was sent a eccentrically written book to proof read which was technically the weirdest thing I have set my eyes on and decided to do a counterculture Vice style review of it. This was the only way I could encapsulate the sheer insane journey that I, as a reader,took. If William S. Burroughs ingested a lethal cocktail of heroin, horse tranc and speed this would be the same outcome.

Read the review.

Junkie Dolls Teaser Poster

Another Junkie Dolls teaser poster of the in-progress demented puppet-centric sitcom aka “Friends-On-Meth” aka The one where they took a lethal cocktail of drugs and lived to tell the tale.

Die Hard Loop Audio

So, I decided that my four year old daughter has a career in audio looping for famous films and here she is doing a thoroughly top job on this clip for Die Hard playing Alan Rickman’s character.

AND she says a line in German.

Jeremy Clarkson’s Opinions (Like We Care)

A self reflective Clarkson opinion piece you won’t read in his Sun column :

That’s the thing about public school educated people like me who end up on television. Because of our superior nihilistic education, this gives us an elitist world view on what we call the downtrodden. If you drive anything less than a hot car/ woman (delete as appropriate) you are dead to me.

We tend to sneer at the lower classes, and poke fun at the foreigners because we deludedly think that our audience will find such things funny. Well, the less intelligent do. The reality is that our cars drive the show. What you are actually watching are just a set of struck-it-lucky wide boys who use a politer form of racism coated in humour for our followers. We sit on top of this perch pissing on everyone below while maintaining a world view marred by the self imposed nihilism,  all harking back to our time at those wrenched-from-our-parents boarding schools. Did i mention that we make a LOT of money for the corporation in merchandising sales?

This is the shining example of why, even though the viewing figures are large they are mostly a greying bunch thereby leaving the younger crowd to move online. We never understood all that anyway as we are the old guard free from such changes in the media landscape. All we did was go HD because you demanded it.

Maybe that punch up with my working class producer was a good thing.

Right, off to the pub.

Junkie Dolls: Another Bloody Poster

Another poster of the long-ish gestating puppet project Junkie Dolls. Simply put what if the cast of Friends are middle class drug addicts? That sitcom element would have taken a darker turn and this is what the show is all about. Think Joey scoring crack in Central Park under a chintzy laugh track.

Trailer coming soon

Dukes Of Hounslow Sitcom Pitch

Here is the latest idea I am touting around. Simply put it is like Dukes of Hazard but set in the lovely town of Hounslow. Obviously there are no other similarities to that iconic show so i will not have to pay royalties. There is no Rosco P Coltrane, Sexy Denim pants or a car with a stupid name.

There is however petrol headed car action and fast paced dialogue in an urban neighbourhood featuring two Indian lead characters. Think of it as Eastenders twinned with Top Gear and featuring some Asian kids.

 

Dick Fatoush sleep video sponsored by Johnny Depp

Proudly sponsored by Johnny Depp, A strangely hypnotic video from Dick Fatoush designed to help put your kids slowly to sleep. Part of the range of self help digital media designed to improve your life in general.

These wordless instructional videos can make you a champion of society no matter what language you speak and remember, Mondays will never be the same after watching this on a constant loop for 20 hours.

 

BBC Television pitch

So, i have the ability to login to the BBC online commissioning site and submit ideas but in reality nothing will ever be commissioned here as the “pickers” have their own relationships.

This doesn’t mean i can’t submit wacky ideas (I mean, where did Gogglebox or Benefits Street come from?) so here is one of my ideas.

God forbid it actually gets to the meeting stage but stranger things have happened!

Dick Fatoush: The Return

Production commencing soon on the comedy pilot,  Dick Fatoush: The Lebanese Detective.

The Lebanese mentalist with a heart of Gold is back to kick some crimefighting bottom.