Tag: top gear

Radio 4: In My Bloody Time

A new sketch from Fuzzy Dice Comedy where we emulate black cabbies and listen to Radio 4 for more than 2 hours…. the results will be shocking and questions will definitely be asked in Parliament.

It’s a wonder how people over 75 can listen to this in there living room and survive such a long barrage of audiophile and depressing prose.

THAT Jeremy Clarkson Top Gear Text

Jeremy Clarkson, ex presenter of Top Gear, and nowadays known as a loose fisted media thug. If he had an ounce of remorse this would be the text he sent to Oisin Tymon but the twat doesn’t have a decent bone in his body so these “sympathetic texts” rarely come out of his phone.


Jeremy Clarkson’s Opinions (Like We Care)

A self reflective Clarkson opinion piece you won’t read in his Sun column :

That’s the thing about public school educated people like me who end up on television. Because of our superior nihilistic education, this gives us an elitist world view on what we call the downtrodden. If you drive anything less than a hot car/ woman (delete as appropriate) you are dead to me.

We tend to sneer at the lower classes, and poke fun at the foreigners because we deludedly think that our audience will find such things funny. Well, the less intelligent do. The reality is that our cars drive the show. What you are actually watching are just a set of struck-it-lucky wide boys who use a politer form of racism coated in humour for our followers. We sit on top of this perch pissing on everyone below while maintaining a world view marred by the self imposed nihilism,  all harking back to our time at those wrenched-from-our-parents boarding schools. Did i mention that we make a LOT of money for the corporation in merchandising sales?

This is the shining example of why, even though the viewing figures are large they are mostly a greying bunch thereby leaving the younger crowd to move online. We never understood all that anyway as we are the old guard free from such changes in the media landscape. All we did was go HD because you demanded it.

Maybe that punch up with my working class producer was a good thing.

Right, off to the pub.

New Eastenders Slogan

We all know that soaps such as Eastenders have comfortable stereotypes removed from all of reality. A situation created by the White Folks in Power who think will make it easier for the audience to switch off and get into the drama so why not go the whole hog and make it the selling point?  Voila! Here’s one I made that the corporation can use with pride.

Comics make great actors

When it comes to film roles, one thing you will consistently notice is that people who come from a background of live stand up comedy can seamlessly play dramatic parts convincingly and to critical acclaim. Look at Jim Carrey, Robin Williams and Steve Coogan. When they play dramatic and/or darker characters they garner rave reviews.

Ever thought about that? It’s not something you would think works but it does.

You see, most stand-up comics make observations about life around them, they are extremely observant of people’s mannerisms. Their routines are consistently based on mimicking. Where method actors get into character, these performers do that anyway night after night over a period of years. One other person of note who transitioned successfully was Lee Evans in Funny Bones.

So when a challenging part comes along(Truman Show, One Hour Photo, Philomena) they can get the right low key performance because of their on the job training.

On the flipside when it comes to actors playing comics it’s the opposite. Take for example Lawrence Olivier, he played a comic in a role and was acclaimed for playing the character as awkward. After all, comics are awkward people in real life. When asked about the role he admitted he played it that way because he felt awkward doing the role.

Also, look at someone more contemporary like Seth Rogan. When he played a comic in Funny People aka Unfunny Film he wasn’t convincing as a live act, more like an actor awkwardly trying to play a comic. Well, I wasn’t convinced but Adam Sandler was good as he had a background in live comedy which made his part more interesting.

Next time you watch a film have a think.


Jeremy Clarkson’s last last last chance






















Due to Jeremy Clarkson managing to dodge another a racial bullet, they say this is the last time for him to screw up.

This is how i imagine the latest “chat” would have gone considering he makes a lot of money for the Corporation.

Even cats are surprised at how many lives he has.